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The readers and commenters contribute so much to the community here.

It feels different to be passed over by a stranger than it is to be turned down by someone you’ve been pining for after you’ve made a grand gesture. For a handful of people I will be just what they want, and they will be just what I want, and who cares about the rest?

You’re giving the person in the second (overly-invested) scenario WAY too much power over your happiness and forgetting that they get to make a snap judgment. What we should also understand, in the name of complete honesty: If you scrape the surface, many dealbreakers stink of sexism, size-ism, classism, able-ism, and racism.

Meeting women is hard because when (if) they flash a big smile (with their nice teeth) at me I just can’t do a big, natural smile back at them.

I just *know* they’ll notice how bad things are and be turned off. Reading through question 99 again…so maybe looks don’t matter and it’s mostly in my head.

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), and to, uh, celebrate this milestone I will be posting a ton and gently directing readers toward the Donation Page all week as part of a twice-yearly pledge drive (in lieu of running ads).Thanks to you we have one of the best commentspaces on the Internet, and letter writers can always depend on you to support them and help them out.On to today’s question, which is about how you seek a romantic relationship when you are insecure about some aspects of yourself. I found my way here after reading this series on depression: That made me realize how depressed I’ve been, and around my birthday a few months ago I decided to do something about it.Part of my problem is I haven’t been in a relationship in many years.So I signed up for some online dating, but it’s been tough.If you enjoy yourself here and can spare a few $, I appreciate them and put them to good use.

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